What are you?
That is what they always asked.
The one question that stood out from my past.
You see, privilege is something I never knew. Growing up poor, you see things and people through. Money is tight, it always is.
People also, lead me amiss
What are you?
Says the kid next to me.
Pale skin, but they couldn’t see
How lucky they are now and have been
I feel like a pauper amongst all of them
Their houses big and tall
All they do is make me feel small
They don’t know how good they’ve got it Because there’s always money in their pocket
What are you?
They ask again
They question my person, my clothes and then, You’re uncool, they said.
You don’t look like me,
This standard they set, so it seems
The nicest clothes and the best house
Seemed to be all they cared about
There’s this house on a hill, you see
All the best schools are there, so they believed This is when I learned things school could not teach
Not everything is fair nor within reach
It is not equal, nor is it just
Continue to fight, we must, we must!
Fight for equality, make it just!
Promote equity for all
We must, we must!
That house on the hill over there, you see?
It stands tall, but it’s not for you or me.
Only for the elite, it seems
The rest of us only see it in our dreams
A constant struggle so it seems
But they did not struggle
Not many priorities to juggle
But who does when you walk this world with eyes closed? Food on the table, nice clothes on their backs Back then, these kids never cut me any slack
They didn’t know me nor what I had
Quit your whining, it’s not that bad
You’re still living aren’t you?
No.
I am just existing.
I am just getting by.
Just trying to get through with tears in my eyes
We don’t have much to eat, the food is not healthy It is a concept strictly for the wealthy
I do acknowledge some things
A mixed ethnic background and a good upbringing A nice place to live in a cul-de-sac
Tucked away not too far back
From Queens, New York is where I’m from
Born and raised until my time is done.
I still long for something better, I still do
A better life for me and you
A house on the hill is what I want, too
Do you see it? It’s there, but it’s far away
Berries on the trees, the sky is gray
A friend, back then, took me to explore this place that day.
A place she called home she said,
Swimming trophies and medals on the mantle and near her bed Been swimming since I was young, she said.
I swam once when I was young too
Started young as well just like you,
But struggle hit and has been present since,
The opportunity was cut short.
There were opportunities for them, for them to succeed Feeling left behind in life, so it seems
I have to catch up, but how, I asked?
Many opportunities to explore, have now passed
This is exhausting, I’m tired, I’ve had enough
I didn’t realize that trying to succeed would be this tough Resources limited and late nights
The journey to success is certainly worth the fight Out of the darkness and into the light
At least I have a place to sleep tonight
What are you?
I wake up in my skin every day
Asian and Black is what I say
But they don’t look like me
Most of them don’t and never have
An outsider looking in, I’d say
A group I was not a part of, no not that day
But when? I know it won’t be today, tomorrow or the next But soon, eventually, if I keep doing my best
That house on the hill is still etched in my mind A reminder in life, not to fall behind
Be wise, be swift, but always be kind
Something they were not.
Fifteen years have passed,
These memories are forever at last,
But still I wait for the day.
Struggling is hard, quitting is too.
Regret is harder and failure…who?
Two bachelor’s degrees later, and you’ll see. Obstacles overcome, do not define me.
Lost many battles, but won the war
Better days are coming and so much more.
But there is one question that remains, The question is all the same.
The struggle is not over, it beckons anyway.
Still waiting for an answer, they said.
Here it comes again, my existential dread.
What are you?
I am me.
Come back and you’ll see,
That house on the hill can be for you and for me. If we support each other, things will come to be.